Was with Richard on the way home but I decided to walk home alone. I sent him home instead. Whatever really. I don't feel so good today anyways. Things are falling apart beautifully for me. Maybe I am home sick, maybe I am sad one of the people in my life is fighting for his life, perhaps I am just sick of being myself like this. Somehow I don't really think about it when I was walking home alone. I saw something beautiful -- The road was sparkling with the ice and frozen water. At one point, I did not even my feet were hurting. I smile by myself and I almost cry. Giggling on the way home coz I remembered all the funny and happy moments in my life, my old life.
Things are way different now. I did so much wrongs in my life and I am not even sure to turn back and restart again, or to just go on like this. I am so sick of this life... very complicated. Why can't we just be happy and smile. and enjoy every moment in this life.
Whatever it is -- pointless to share anyways, no one really care if you have bad days. no one even notice you need someone to be there for you. Or notice you are feeling shit :)
end of story x
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