I do not understand how things really work in this life. I really don't. Some people just told me not to worry about how it works. I am curious. My curiosity might just be too much... Well to be honest I don't even know how my life actually works.
For example: I met someone, I think whatever happened between us, was and still is quite sweet. Odd at the same time. Coincidence too. I never believe in "Perfect timing" as most people prefer. I am a person who just love to take chances and risks. It is more like now or never. Sometimes all these fierceness can cause a bit of uncomfortable consequences to myself... one thing I realised that we both are totally from different world, background, culture and religion. Okay, great some people accept it openly and others just don't. Yes, who cares about what people say, but how about when it comes to your family? This is where all the dramas and complications started! How actually all these complications can be resolved and makes everyone happy? The answer is impossible.
Actually that's not the point... (^_^)~~
It's 30th January today -first month of 2009 is almost over... Time flies by so fast, scares me a lot. To be honest, I really hate the fact that knowing February is approaching. Someone is leaving... I am happy to know he decided to do something with his life. (a plan) .. Thoughtful. :) It sucks knowing that I will miss him a LOT. Traveling up or down will be costly too (for both, considering what's going to happen next, things are unpredictable) = sucks. What am I going to do without you here, Newcastle is going to be dull without you. Really will miss that cigarette smell (,-_-,) Who is going to get me Coca-Cola when I am broke? Who is going to admire my scrap booking work? Who is going to bitch with me? Who is going to make me laugh about "Diana Alarm clock"? Who is going to say the nerdiest thing to me? In short - you will be really missed by me... I suck expressing myself verbally. And yes I should not be reminding you, that it is sooner than you thought. It will happen anyways... right? It is okay I am sad now, at least I won't be that sad when the time really comes. We will be all right... Like you said, lets see how it will fall.
Sigh. I wish everything is different. I wish I am different... I don't even know what to say now. It must be the time of the month, where I feel so down and sad. All the things in my head will just gang up on me.
I miss home. I miss mom scolding me. Miss my youngest brother stupid jokes. Miss fighting with my youngest sister. Miss being spoiled by my two eldest sister. Miss bitching with my friends. Miss driving so fast and scare myself out. Miss shopping till I got broke and have to stay at home for weeks. Miss all the good memories... Most of all, I miss being me.
I will just stop here for tonight. I am rather confuse now. Things might not go as I plan. Guess life is all about taking chances and see how it goes from there...
Beb's Saturday Agenda:
Something I need to do sooner:
For example: I met someone, I think whatever happened between us, was and still is quite sweet. Odd at the same time. Coincidence too. I never believe in "Perfect timing" as most people prefer. I am a person who just love to take chances and risks. It is more like now or never. Sometimes all these fierceness can cause a bit of uncomfortable consequences to myself... one thing I realised that we both are totally from different world, background, culture and religion. Okay, great some people accept it openly and others just don't. Yes, who cares about what people say, but how about when it comes to your family? This is where all the dramas and complications started! How actually all these complications can be resolved and makes everyone happy? The answer is impossible.
Actually that's not the point... (^_^)~~
It's 30th January today -first month of 2009 is almost over... Time flies by so fast, scares me a lot. To be honest, I really hate the fact that knowing February is approaching. Someone is leaving... I am happy to know he decided to do something with his life. (a plan) .. Thoughtful. :) It sucks knowing that I will miss him a LOT. Traveling up or down will be costly too (for both, considering what's going to happen next, things are unpredictable) = sucks. What am I going to do without you here, Newcastle is going to be dull without you. Really will miss that cigarette smell (,-_-,) Who is going to get me Coca-Cola when I am broke? Who is going to admire my scrap booking work? Who is going to bitch with me? Who is going to make me laugh about "Diana Alarm clock"? Who is going to say the nerdiest thing to me? In short - you will be really missed by me... I suck expressing myself verbally. And yes I should not be reminding you, that it is sooner than you thought. It will happen anyways... right? It is okay I am sad now, at least I won't be that sad when the time really comes. We will be all right... Like you said, lets see how it will fall.
Sigh. I wish everything is different. I wish I am different... I don't even know what to say now. It must be the time of the month, where I feel so down and sad. All the things in my head will just gang up on me.
I miss home. I miss mom scolding me. Miss my youngest brother stupid jokes. Miss fighting with my youngest sister. Miss being spoiled by my two eldest sister. Miss bitching with my friends. Miss driving so fast and scare myself out. Miss shopping till I got broke and have to stay at home for weeks. Miss all the good memories... Most of all, I miss being me.
I will just stop here for tonight. I am rather confuse now. Things might not go as I plan. Guess life is all about taking chances and see how it goes from there...
Beb's Saturday Agenda:
- wake up early, like really early
- shower
- clean up dishes/ room
- Economic Revision
- Meet Xiao Nan
- Evening with him
- off to Buckley's Dreamland
Something I need to do sooner:
- Budgetting my fucked up financial shite
- organise lecture notes
- laundry shower towel
- More revision?
- Read the two books I bought
Much Love,
Bebs - Spoiled queen of darkness
Bebs - Spoiled queen of darkness
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